Tuesday, November 29, 2011

[Everything doTERRA] Reactive Attachment Disorder

This might be one of the few things in life upon which I am an expert. I have 11 children--9 adopted, most with special needs and many of those have RAD. I have also done respite for 40+ children who have RAD--some as long as 2 1/2 years. My first response is to see if you can diffuse oils in the classroom--I can't imagine that it would be a problem, but I would still check it out. My second suggestion is along the lines of what Pat said in putting the oils on her fingers. Another highly successful way of sharing oils is the little necklace I have from aroma tools that has the little "pot" (for lack of a better term) into which you put the oils. I put the oils in there and anyone fairly close to me will also get the benefits. But really--while I am a HUGE fan of the oils, I am not sure that the oils will take care of this. There is a whole lot of psychology behind this statement, but….a child with RAD is looking for someone who is strong enough to take care of them. If you aren't, not matter how hard the behavior gets, they will not respect you and they will not obey--ever. Their feeling is that is you can't take care of me, I won't trust you and therefore, I won't respect you. And if you can't make me behave, then you are weak. Plain and simple. So…I would NEVER advocate being mean, but you do need to set firm limits and refuse to give in. Once they know you're strong enough to handle them, then things will settle down. Also realize the behaviors usually escalate while they are forcing your hand. I would handle this by having a "back up" person teach the lesson while you handle the child for a few weeks. I have done this over and over again--once they get that I"m not going anywhere and that I can handle what they say/do, they settle down and I can go back to teaching again. Just a thought….

Charly

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