Wednesday, December 16, 2009

[mompowergroup] Digest Number 257

Messages In This Digest (11 Messages)

1a.
Re: violent choldren From: Carolina Land
2a.
Re: A Xmas dumping From: Kathleen
2b.
Re: A Xmas dumping From: MARIAN ASEMAYUWA
2c.
Re: A Xmas dumping From: Heather Kalb
2d.
Re: A Xmas dumping From: renuka rajan
3.
Re: Christmas Dumping From: Diana A
4a.
Re: A Xmas dumping/ what I did From: Vickie Washburn
4b.
Re: A Xmas dumping/ what I did From: renuka rajan
5a.
Re: The Greatest Gift in the World From: renuka rajan
5b.
Re: The Greatest Gift in the World From: Frank Schoch
6a.
I just completed a novel! From: S.Moghaddam

Messages

1a.

Re: violent choldren

Posted by: "Carolina Land" cm_orquidea@yahoo.com   cm_orquidea

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:16 am (PST)



Thank you Sangita! Very nice advice and good to all of us specially on this hard times!

From: P JETHWANI <jethwani@btinternet.com>

My doctor told me, bad temper may be due to a blood sugar condition known as hypoglycaemia, ask your family doctor about this.

The dieticians usually advise a whole grain/wholefood diet for this.


2a.

Re: A Xmas dumping

Posted by: "Kathleen" emmac819@yahoo.com   emmac819

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:19 am (PST)



I agree to wait a few more weeks for the sake of the kids. This will affect their memory for all the years to come. Living together 7 years is considered a common law marriage and make sure you get everything you deserve and worked for, especially since you were the one to do it all. He is responsible for his kids as well and make sure he does what he is suppose to do and also just because this one didnt work out doesn't mean a different relationship won't. Don't give up on yourself at all, and don't let him stand in the way of your moving on with your life. Also remember to keep the kids out of the ugly parts, it will only hurt them to be involved in it and you don't want to leave the impression that one parent is less then the other. Never compare one parent against the other, that will only lead to your kids having a difficult time loving the other parent, themselves and someone in their adult age to make a life of their own. Good Luck and I hope you make the best of your and your kids lives and all Holidays to come. :)

--- In mompowergroup@yahoogroups.com, "Sonya" <srjelks@...> wrote:
>
> Is it bad timing to end a relationship with my children's father during this Xmas season? I think it's official...I've had enough of doing all of the work in raising our two kids! We are not married but have been living together for over 7 years and he just doesn't get the concept that if I do all the work regarding the girls that makes me a single parent! I've tried to get him to help out more around the house and do more activities with the kids, but it's still not consistent and that's not fair to me. I work and contribute more income to our household than he does since I make more money and he has kids from a previous marriage. I'm just fed up and I think I will be less frustrated with him if we did live separately.
>

2b.

Re: A Xmas dumping

Posted by: "MARIAN ASEMAYUWA" mariannguemo@yahoo.co.uk   mariannguemo

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:21 am (PST)



Do you know what , it always seems like you can't go on and you want out, sit down and put all you do and all he does on a piece of paper. Ask your self do I enjoy any thing about this relationship. any good times, laughter etc. If you arelooking for comfort else were you will not be able to get a honest decision on this matter. Womanhood involves giving and sharing and this two alway brings a woman plenty of satisfaction, completeness. Your children are involved think again. who ever you meet after will never love and protect them he will.The lady who told  you her sad story is talking from a painful experience. Sonya think things through, divorce has a sneaky way of disarming you so powerfully you will not recognise youself. I pray you take the right steps.all the best

________________________________
From: Sonya <srjelks@earthlink.net>
To: mompowergroup@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Sun, 13 December, 2009 7:13:45
Subject: [mompowergroup] A Xmas dumping

 
Is it bad timing to end a relationship with my children's father during this Xmas season? I think it's official...I' ve had enough of doing all of the work in raising our two kids! We are not married but have been living together for over 7 years and he just doesn't get the concept that if I do all the work regarding the girls that makes me a single parent! I've tried to get him to help out more around the house and do more activities with the kids, but it's still not consistent and that's not fair to me. I work and contribute more income to our household than he does since I make more money and he has kids from a previous marriage. I'm just fed up and I think I will be less frustrated with him if we did live separately.

2c.

Re: A Xmas dumping

Posted by: "Heather Kalb" hjkalb@gmail.com   drhjkalb

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:30 am (PST)



My daughter's father is an alcoholic also. Out of desperation I went to
Al-Anon which is for the family and friends of alcoholics. My first visit
to Al-Anon I wanted to know what to do with my mate. I was informed Al-Anon
was for and about me - not the alcoholic. I was resistant at first (after
all he was the one with the obvious problem laugh), but the group saved my
sanity and gave me the support I needed.

Heather

On Mon, Dec 14, 2009 at 7:48 AM, Frank <fschoch@ymail.com> wrote:

>
> Hello Sonya, my name is Karen. I don't think this is a bad time for you to
> get rid of him,if you were to wait till after the holidays you would only
> make yourself & your children un-happy. I too do all the work raising my 1
> year old son,his father is a drunk & don't like to do any-thing to help. I
> wish I had your strength to get rid of him but I don't as of yet.so don't
> let anyone tell you that your wrong I think you are very brave for doing
> what you did.

2d.

Re: A Xmas dumping

Posted by: "renuka rajan" bk_renukarajan@yahoo.com   bk_renukarajan

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:33 am (PST)



Hai Sonya and Karen,

i know its hard for all of you at this time of the year to dump ... Life has its ups and downs and its sure difficult to make such decisions. Its easy to open up and ask for advice BUT its not as easy as that for us to accept the advice.
Sometimes, u feel others have given wrong advice. The best advice would be to go deep into silence and solitude to get answers from within yourself.
Just to share one of the experience i had...
Sometime ago, a friend of mine was going thro hell with her spouse. In the wee hours of the morning, she called me up crying and pouring her heart out. She also said, earlier in the day she had gone to the local police station and made a report against him.
She had a three year old child. Prior to that, she had been going out with another man for a couple of years but due to differences in religious beliefs, he dumped her saying if you love me u should love my religion too! Well .... that was his definition of love.
Finally, when she met this hubby of hers, she told him the truth of her previous relationships and each time in bed he harasses her with questions of her past.
But i had no way to advice her on her personal life and told her to sit and think about the pros and cons. If u think enough is enough, u have to be firm otherwise be cautious on your decision.
Finally, she made the decision to stay on with him and OMG she has another baby and said she is "happily married"
What a big MISTAKE i would have made had i suggested anything.

SOLITUDE AND SILENCE IN REMEMBRANCE OF THE ALMIGHTY WILL GIVE U ANSWERS. NOW IS THE END OF IRON-AGE AND THESE THINGS ARE GOING TO BE A COMMON SIGHT AND NO ASSUARANCE IN LIFE.
ONLY GUARANTEE IS WITH THE SUPREME WHO WOULD TRULY LOVE US. IF U UNDERSTAND THE PHILOSOPHY OF ACTIONS (karma) YOU WILL NOT FEEL SO MUCH OF HATRED OR VENGEANCE FOR ANYONE.

Best Rgds
renuka
malaysia (just my opinion, choice is yours)

________________________________
From: Frank <fschoch@ymail.com>

Hello Sonya, my name is Karen. I don't think this is a bad time for you to get rid of him,if you were to wait till after the holidays you would only make yourself & your children un-happy. I too do all the work raising my 1 year old son,his father is a drunk & don't like to do any-thing to help. I wish I had your strength to get rid of him but I don't as of yet.so don't let anyone tell you that your wrong I think you are very brave for doing what you did. if you wanna talk here is my email fschoch@ymail. com feel free to chat @ me whenever you want

3.

Re: Christmas Dumping

Posted by: "Diana A" loving_my_life7@yahoo.com   loving_my_life7

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:21 am (PST)



This is very good advice.  Especially because there are young children involved & it is the holiday season.  It would really stink for the children's only holiday memories to be that of heartache, seperation, etc.  However, use this time to put a definite plan into action and have all of your I's dotted & T's crossed, as much as you can during this tough time.  Best wishes during this time of trial.  Stay strong, press on & remember that the children will need a little extra TLC during this time, as it will be a difficult time for them as well.  Don't forget to take a few minutes for yourself!

~Blessings~

4a.

Re: A Xmas dumping/ what I did

Posted by: "Vickie Washburn" ickyscuba@yahoo.com   ickyscuba

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:27 am (PST)



My personal experience.  Several years ago with a 2 yr old and a 3 yr old I decided in Oct to file for divorce for same reasons. If I was going to be a single mom then I wanted to be single. My husband was gone a lot and when he was home he was pretty disconnected from us all.  So the divorce hearing was on Dec. 9th.  We did not tell our family or our children until after the first of the year.  We went to family Christmas' together and no one knew the difference.  Was it uncomfortable, a little but it was worth the smiles on my children's faces and was worth not having to put up with the hassels from family on both sides.  He as much more attentive after the divorce of course.  Some wake up calls are pretty drastic!

good luck
Vickie

From:mompowergroup@ yahoogroups. com [mailto:mompowergro up@yahoogroups. com] On Behalf Of Sonya
Is it bad timing to end a relationship with my children's father during this Xmas season? I think it's official...I' ve had enough of doing all of the work in raising our two kids! We are not married but have been living together for over 7 years and he just doesn't get the concept that if I do all the work regarding the girls that makes me a single parent! I've tried to get him to help out more around the house and do more activities with the kids, but it's still not consistent and that's not fair to me. I work and contribute more income to our household than he does since I make more money and he has kids from a previous marriage. I'm just fed up and I think I will be less frustrated with him if we did live separately.

4b.

Re: A Xmas dumping/ what I did

Posted by: "renuka rajan" bk_renukarajan@yahoo.com   bk_renukarajan

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:34 am (PST)



Bobbie,
A great experience for everyone to learn too. Best wishes in your life
rgds
renuka malaysia

________________________________
From: Bobbie Masterson <petitelove@gmail.com>

The result: After 5 years apart, he came back. We have now been
remarried for 5 years and have a 20 month old son. He has become a much better dad and we have both matured immensely.

You have to follow your heart.


5a.

Re: The Greatest Gift in the World

Posted by: "renuka rajan" bk_renukarajan@yahoo.com   bk_renukarajan

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:30 am (PST)



Hai Mehri,
will it be ok to address you as Mehri? i am a malaysian, malayalee origin. My late father is from Kerala India (came to M'sia during the War as a soldier and settled in M'sia) my mum is from Penang, Malaysia. So i am half indian and half malaysian. Thank you for enjoying Malaysia. How often do you come here?
Where are u from?
Best Rgds
renuka
malaysia

________________________________
From: Mehri Sedaghat Shayegan <m_sedaghat_sh@yahoo.com>

Hi renuka...... I really like Maleysia where is great nature and kind people.....renuka u r maleysian or indian or chinies? take care

5b.

Re: The Greatest Gift in the World

Posted by: "Frank Schoch" fschoch@ymail.com   fschoch@ymail.com

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:35 am (PST)



Dear Renuka,
           there is no need for an apology I understand I should have signed my name to the poem. I have all boys 20,16,11 & 1. the only one who is home with me is my 1 year old who right now has a really bad cough, so I guess I have to call the dr. 2-day for him. if you would liketo talk I'm always here. Merry Christmas to you & your family talk to you soon
                  Karen

________________________________
From: renuka rajan <bk_renukarajan@yahoo.com>

Madam,
i am so sorry, i just saw this reply. Karen how old is your daughter? i have 4 kids from 25, 22, 18 and 16
Once again my humble apologies Maam.
Have a pleasant day
Wrmst Rgds,
renuka
malaysia

6a.

I just completed a novel!

Posted by: "S.Moghaddam" sfayazmoghadam@yahoo.com   sfayazmoghadam

Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:33 am (PST)




Congratulations, Joanie.
Wish you luck and hope you'll do more.
Best Regards
Sima

 

Recent Activity
Visit Your Group
Yahoo! Groups

Auto Enthusiast Zone

Love cars? Check out the

Auto Enthusiast Zone

Yahoo! Groups

Mental Health Zone

Learn about issues

Find support

Celebrity kids

and families

Surviving in

the spotlight

Need to Reply?

Click one of the "Reply" links to respond to a specific message in the Daily Digest.

Create New Topic | Visit Your Group on the Web

No comments:

Post a Comment